A Yorkshire poem by Lynda Goodwin
Alf’s Big Surprise!
It wer a baking bank ‘oliday weekend,
an Alf ad nowt to do,
id sent their lass up tahn tot shops,
it being er birthday too.
So nah is on is tod all day –
e thought it through and through,
e drummed is fingers on is knees
an giv is pipe a chew.
“Ah know” e said, a gret big smile
spread slowly cross is chops,
“Al put misen to some good use
while shis spendin dahn at shops.
“Al build a pond int garden –
al mek it big an wide,
so shick’n sit wit glass int and
ont deckchair by it’s side.”
E went n fetched a pick n spade,
a rusty ammer too,
a crowbar juster prize aht rocks –
thes barned to bi a few!
Alf huffed n puffed an dug all day
tilt sweat dripped offer is noowas,
it trickled dahn is achin back
an sooaked is mucky cloowas.
E pushed is foot ont spade once moor –
but t’spade it wouldn’t budge,
id it a box deep dahn int soil
all covered up wi sludge.
“Av farned sum treasure!” Alf did gasp
an plonked dahn ontot grass,
“Dunt think al oppen it misen,
al leave it for ah lass!”
Alf dug no more, just smiled and grinned,
by gum, ow well id done!
not just a pond – but jewels fer er,
an stretched aht undert sun.
Id nodded off when she gor ome –
Shi froze n stared in shock –
then marched up to is side n glared
at tin set out ont rock.
“It’s all fer you!” Alf blinked is eyes
an beamed from ear to ear,
“A thought that thad bi overt moon,
look warrav found thi ere!”
“Ye can’t” she wailed, “wot ave yer done?”
“Ey lass dunt speyk in riddles”
“Am not!” she cried “just purrit back –
that’s weer wi buried Tiddles!!”
“Oh well” thought Alf to imsen, “thell be other birthdays.”
sourced: i yorkshire. com