Chapter I
I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost … I am helpless.
It isn’t my fault.
It takes me forever to find a way out.

Chapter II
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don’t see it.
I fall in again.
I can’t believe I am in the same place.
But it isn’t my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.

Chapter III
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in … it’s a habit.
My eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.

Chapter IV
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.

Chapter V

Dear all,

My partner Lynne and I have spent much of our semi-lockdown time doing crosswords, which daily end up in the bin. If we did tapestry or origami, we would at least have something to show to people, even if people didn’t want to be shown it.

Ah, people say, but at least you’re keeping your mind active, as if crosswords were the equivalent of visits to the gym, which they are not because if they were, we would be both be leaping around like Fatima Whitbread.

I’m not sure that crosswords are even very useful as mental exercise. Many very good minds have been destroyed by dementia and it seems rather cruel to suggest it’s partly the victims’ fault; that spending more time on crosswords or sudoku would have averted the tragedy.

But that’s not the real purpose of crosswords anyway. They are, like jigsaws or taking a nap, a way of putting the demands of the world to one side for a while – actually quite a long while in lockdown conditions.

Crossword puzzlers have nothing to worry about except a small grid and 26 letters. It’s a bit like a mindfulness exercise, but without the therapeutic pretentions, and, unlike many leisure activities – sport, TV cookery, beard-growing  or discussing your children, for example –  it’s thoroughly non-competitive.

During my decades working for the Yorkshire Post Newspapers, many of my colleagues spent much of their time between their paid duties trying to complete the Guardian cryptic crossword, which, in the nature of daily journalism, was easier on some days than others and had to be abandoned completely during the Twin Towers attack.

At the end of the working day, if we had the time, we might discuss our efforts to complete the crossword, although there were no prizes, just the mutual satisfaction we took in a good clue meeting a good solution – for example, a recent Guardian clue was ‘Very much affected, as are one’s neighbours (6,7)’, and the answer was, ‘Beside oneself’, which, unless you’re brighter than me, only becomes obvious when you know it.

Crossword-doers seldom join clubs but they are united by some unwritten rules. They know, for example, that the word ‘flowers’ can refer either to blooms, like roses, or to things that flow, like the River Euphrates (or the River Superheat, as it’s known to people who can’t resist anagrams).

And, outside the rather small world of ecclesiastical architecture, it’s mostly crossword fillers-in who know the word ‘raredos’, meaning a sort of ornamental altar screen. Crossword compilers use it a lot, although, despite spending most of my life trying to get inside their brains, I still have no idea why.

Wonderful Oliver, thank you once again, until next time…..

Good morning,

Dear all,

From Room to Zoom! i’ve joined the Chorus of ‘Opera North’ No you won’t see me on stage in their next production – this is ‘From Couch to Chorus’ an invitation via ‘Caring Together’s’ web post. Rehearsals involve one hour a week on Zoom with homework at one’s leisure ; yet another event to come out of Lockdown. Registering was easy, stating which ‘Voice’, in my case Alto, with help given to non-singers to determine their range. I anticipated a good turnout of Altos but was amazed – as were Opera North, that we numbered  470! ‘Chat’ messages came up on my lap top screen,  “Hi I’m from Roundhay” or “Headingley” – but one group of singers were in Australia! They continued with “Anyone from ‘Inspirations Choir?” and “Any Barbershoppers out there?” which were funny questions anyway as they couldn’t save seats and sit next to each other! Jenny, our Host gave an introductory talk about the project followed by a ‘warm-up’ I hadn’t taken into consideration that there would be a physical as well as vocal warm-up so had made the mistake of sitting next to the wall which didn’t help with arms stretching up “and arms down to your side” which meant I could only use one arm properly.  Today I may even stand up, though it isn’t compulsory yet, unlike many other things at the moment!

We sang through a few pages of ‘Va Pensiero’ and ‘Habanera’ from ‘Nabucco’ and ‘Carmen’ respectively, albeit we were muted so that each singer wouldn’t be distracted by 469 other Altos. Sheet music and recordings had been e-mailed to us prior to rehearsal. For those unable to print the music, it was also shown on screen; plus each voice has a choice of five recordings with which to rehearse for homework. I have been e-mailed the same for a chorus from ‘The Bartered Bride’ so I have been learning as much o’ ‘t’other two’ prior to today’s session. I’ve spent most of my adult life singing in Musicals and with Choirs – never a soloist, just happy to learn challenging harmonies and it’s made me realise just how much I miss it. At the end of the four weeks there will be a final session when all the Sopranos, Altos, Tenors and Basses will – I think – be recorded as one huge Choir! All this is in exchange for an (optional) ‘pay what you feel’ donation to ‘Opera North’s’ funds.

I find it all quite incredible how so many people are brought together by different events, at home, and by Zoom. Not having to turn out in all weathers for the bus to rehearse is equally appealing too!  By the time we reach the end of our Operatic venture, my hibernated voice should hopefully have stopped cracking and croaking and I will be hungry for more. I wonder if ‘Opera North’ will have time for another ‘Couch to Chorus’ before they – hopefully – are back on stage again. I might suggest we tackle Wagner’s ‘Ring Cycle’ next!

You can learn more about the workshops and how to join here.

All the best for today Maureen… until next time

Good Afternoon

As the Covid-19 lockdown eases, and we move towards our new ‘normal’ the Covid19 Trading Standards Team are intending to reduce the frequency of the Alert – to monthly.

Please find attached the latest West Yorkshire Trading Standards Newsletter Scam Alert. This weekly alert outlines trending fraud patterns during the current COVID-19 pandemic and what we can do to stay protected. There have been further reports of scams, doorstep Crime and business complaints all relating to the COVID-19 pandemic here in West Yorkshire. This news alert will give you an indication of the current situation here in West Yorkshire.

Thank you

Dear all,

“Is the kettle on?” – I first heard the word ‘Elevenses’ when I was four or five playing with friends. Mrs Chaffer would say to her son Keith and his friends “time for elevenses” and reward us with milk and biscuits. I would have never believed that almost 70 years later, friends and aquaintances would meet for ‘Elevenses’, but each in their own homes, watching and talking to each other on a screen, bigger than the one we all sat round to watch “The Coronation” on. Yes, ‘Zoom’ courtesy of ‘Caring Together’ and hosted by Lisa is a lovely way to spend an hour each Thursday morning. As we log in and each face pops up on screen we all give a welcoming greeting and wave – which is quite funny as I’ve found it happens in business meetings too. At the end of the meeting, everyone waves as we say ‘goodbye’ and I wonder if we do this on entering or leaving a room? I don’t believe we do but it’s all part of the camaraderie and fun of ‘Zoom’.

We’ve all been thoroughly enjoying these weekly meet-ups and catching up with the latest events. Whether it’s the latest Covid rulings or what’s been happening around Woodhouse and beyond, we’ve shared ups and downs, admired the latest haircuts and generally had an entertaining hour. We have our cuppa and refreshments, compare notes on how we see Leeds is getting steadily busier and  discuss what the next musical is to be streamed on TV. There’s always laughter and it makes us all feel  better for it. All too soon our time is up and there is a chorus of ‘bye’ and ‘see you next week’ – with the customary waving of course – as Lisa flicks the switch and we all disappear from the screen. It reminds me of back in the 1950s when my favourite programme ‘Andy Pandy’ finished and I cried when they all went into the basket ‘until next time’.  I haven’t cried yet at ‘Elevenses’ but I may do yet – with laughing!

How lovely Maureen, thank you so much, we do enjoy it.

Caring Together Online ‘Elevenses’ is every Thursday at 11am  

If you would like to join us then please do let me know, I can help with getting you set up if needed, and even have some trial runs. It is all very informal and no need to join each week, just when you feel like it. We would love to see you 🙂 Email: lisa@caringtogether.org.uk

See the below picture of some of us all looking intently at some artefact Graham had been given. We were unsure what it was.